Tag Archives: blatant procrastination

I Now Pronounce You Woman and Pillowcase: A Look at Official Male Dakimakura

I’ve lamented it many times before, and I’m sure I’ll be whining about it for years to come– girls just don’t get enough anime merch.  Companies are happy to churn out a million Yoko figures and hugging pillows for even the most obscure bishoujo show,  but when it comes to pandering to female audiences, the machine comes to a screeching halt.  As a result, the only option we have to satiate our wish to collect is to turn to doujinshi and buy the occasional trading figure.  That’s not good enough!  Doujin stuff is great and all, but I want acknowledgment from the animation companies themselves!  I want them to tell me, “You have [sick and twisted] desires, so we will satisfy them!”

So that’s why I’m glad for those rare times a full-sized (none of that jumbo cushion crap)   fabric representation of a male character comes out.  They may be sold out before I even get to think about them, but dammit, it’s something!  Here’s a run down of all the official releases that I know of.

These came out in 2007, and are actually bedsheets, not dakimakura.  Gintama seems like a weird choice in terms of content, since it’s a long-running comedy/action Shonen Jump anime.  It’s very popular with fangirls though, so I imagine it must have been doubly so in 2007.

Anyway, these bedsheets are rare in loot pictures.  Actually, I don’t think I’ve even seen a picture of these, since every picture of these has the Gintoki one as a pillowcase.  Unless these people are skilled at turning bedsheets into pillowcases, I think its safe to say those are bootlegs.

The Simon dakimakura came out in 2008, but I don’t think it actually exists.    For one, this is an utterly bizarre character choice.  If Gainax wanted to whore off one of their male characters, wouldn’t Kaworu be the more logical and profitable choice?  And if this was meant to ride the Gurren wave, wouldn’t it make more sense to make one of Kamina?  Or even adult Simon?  But even if we lose the bishonen angle and go with the idea that this dakimakura meant for cross-gender appeal, that still doesn’t make sense.  He looks like a boy, not a trap, as seen in his prominently-displayed chest.  So who in the world was meant to buy this pillow?

I’ve also never seen this dakimakura in a fan’s loot picture.  Ever.

This Rippongi pillow isn’t due until next month, October.  If I’m not leaving anything out, that’s a full two-year gap between official male dakimakura releases.  Anyway, Miracle Train is an amusing show, but don’t think it set the fujoshi world afire.  Still, the Miracle Train committe has pulled out full stops to appeal to them (off the top of my head, there was a yaoi café event and the creation of the Ikebukuro station — I’ll have to write another post about that later), so a dakimakura seems like the logical conclusion.  Picking Rippongi makes sense, since he’s the most popular character on the show.

Finally, we have these lovely Durarara bedsheets, which are slated for release in November.  Very similar situation with Gintama bedsheets– same company, same cross-gender appeal, same crazy fujoshi fandom.  Admittedly, I haven’t seen Durarara yet, so I don’t know what the fuss is about yet, but I’ve seen these guys everywhere since the show’s aired.   And looking through the character goods, I’m led to believe that these guys are the main characters, and the show’s about their homosexually-charged rivalry.  Is that correct?  Hahaha.

Anyway, that’s about it for the body pillows.  I really hope I’m missing some.  There are a few cushions of male characters, but those are mostly just promo art pasted on a small pillow.   It may be a little something, but it’s a cop out.  I’m sick of cop outs– just give us what we really want!

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[BBC] Top Five Films

Doing another BBC post. Not an “official” one, but one Hollow (The Criminal Inside of Me) did a while back (Paul did it too (Let’s Hear It for the Boy)), because I can’t even think of five covers.   Where do you guys find the time to listen to that much music?!?

5. Perfect Blue
I didn’t really know what to expect from this. How could you make something as straight forward as an idol and her stalker a mindfuck?  I don’t know how, but Satoshi Kon can.   Jesus Christ.   The only reason I really know what happened at the end of the movie is because of the seiyuu interviews.  That aside,  I really can’t articulate why this film is so great.  The way the idol lifestyle is approached is particularly chilling,  not because it’s done outlandishly, but because it seems so realistic.  Animation isn’t put to full use here, but it works.  My heart was racing for the entire film.  I really need to check out more of Kon’s work.

(God that is such a lame tagline.)

4. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Movies are usually a disappointment for me.   Poor plotting, pointless details, abrupt endings, filler, unmemorable endings, I could go on.  But I wouldn’t change anything about Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.   I can’t tell you exactly what it is that made me like this movie so much, because I was too busy actually being involved in the movie (also, I forgot).   It’s just a beautiful movie.    I need to check out everything that Kaufman has touched.

3.  Heavy Metal

A full length cartoon with evil green orbs, morally bankrupt heroes, pot smoking aliens, a sexy warrior chick, and cartoon titties…Heavy Metal is all about entertaining, and it delivers.

(I’m planning to write about this one later.)

My life will be complete only if I can go to at least on RHPS screening.

2. The Rocky Horror Picture Show
This is a musical about sexually deviant aliens seducing people in a hilarious send up of cheesy 50’s horror movies.  If you don’t like this movie, I am afraid we can’t be friends.

1. End of Evangelion
I liked the TV ending a lot, I really did.   I like the idea of humanity being stuck in a collective mind forever, but it’s a very quiet thing.  Not much to see there.  EoE,  on the other hand, just explodes.  There’s color and vibrancy and blood and guts and sex everywhere, and it’s wonderful.   It evokes the same emotional intensity that the TV series does, but in a very different way.  The  “Komm, susser Todd” sequence is amazing.   I won’t say something as stupid as “I’ll always vividly remember it,” but there’s something about it that just sticks with me.  EoE isn’t exactly the most coherent movie, but it hit me hard.  It’s one of the only pieces of art that appeals directly to me;  my emotions, my very being.  Which is a good reason for it to be my favorite movie, I guess…

Review: Princess

I’ve been too obsessed/stressed with Guts to do anything.  ANYTHING (except watch cartoons).

Anders Morgenthaler

Denmark

2006

I had found out about this movie during one of my epic procrastination sessions, and it seemed far more interesting than the history essay I was supposed to be doing at the time.  A violent cartoon about a missionary getting revenge for his dead porn star sister and her kid sounded wonderfully fucked up.  So you can imagine how ecstatic I was when I saw this at my favorite store (in the anime section lololol).  The store’s imminent demise forced me to get it, and, well…

This is a very confused movie.  One part of it is this touching story about a sexually abused child and her new uncle trying to cope and have a normal life, and the other part is this campy, gory revenge story full of sex and fucking shit up.  These parts never reconcile.  I was emotionally engaged in the beginning of the movie, with the scenes with Mia and August and life before his sister became a porn star, but as the movie went on,  I just stopped caring.  The ending, while pretty interesting by itself, just made me feel “meh.”

This is probably because the movie itself doesn’t really know what it wants to convey.  Mia’s sexual abuse really is horrific, and the movie  appropriately shows that, but when she beats a guy to death with a crowbar, the violence is so over the top it’s almost funny.  Same with the porn star, Princess.  When you see her medical records and her shitty life, it’s sad, but when you see she’s buried under a ring of stone phalluses and an epitaph that reads “May you spread your legs for angels like you did for us,”  it’s hilarious.  The movie has things that are genuinely depressing, but then it stacks so many of them on top of each other that it’s neither touching nor funny.

So…the animation.  The movie was animated at a pretty low-budget and, uh, it shows.  The opening scene stood out as sort of horrible.  There are some good moments though, mostly in the fight scenes (the scene where the missionary mangles a little kid is hilarious) and the surreal, couldn’t-do-this-in-any-other-medium scenes.  The character designs for the non-main characters were actually interesting too, so scenes with them were fun to watch.  Never a scene where they just stand and talk though.  That’s a plus.

The best thing about this movie though, I think, are the live action parts.  You see them when August has flashbacks, watches old video tapes he recorded, and at the end.   They’re the most grounded parts of the movie, and I was disappointed when I realized there wasn’t going to be a lot of them.  A good amount of the movie tries to takes a live action approach to shots/ scenes (ex. constant close up on eyes, the opening scene),  I think I would have enjoyed this movie more if it was all in live action,  honestly.

Anyway, this is an alright movie.  I guess I liked it, and I’m sort of glad I bought it, even though the shock value didn’t really amount to anything.  Maybe I’ll like it upon a second viewing, I don’t know.  I give it a 6.5/10.

On a better note, I’m now 1/4 of the way through serious animated movies I’ve been meaning to watch.

[BBC] Songs That Make Me Happy

I’m going to define happiness as a  fun, mindless feeling.  Because who can be happy if they’re thinking all of the time?

5. Lollipop (Candyman)- Aqua

This song is like your childhood threw up all over a bunch of ravers.  And that’s awesome.  I kind of don’t know what this song is about, candy or sex or something?  Nor do I really care.  I could honestly listen to Aqua all day.  (Really gay unknown fact:  I started liking this sort of music after seeing so many Ouran AMVs set it.)

4. Strange Disease- Prozzak

I love Prozzak.  What’s not to love about a bunch of really, really catchy songs about being broken up with (maybe I should rephrase that better)?  Granted, now that I’m not eight, it’s obvious that almost all of their songs sound the same and the animation for their videos really sucks, but again, I don’t care.  This song is bouncy and fun and I can put it on repeat and not get bored.  (Also, Simon is cute.)

3. La-Di Da-Di- Mindless Self Indulgence

I REALLY REALLY LIKE MINDLESS SELF INDULGENCE OK, STOP LAUGHING.  They never fail at being entertaining,  dammit!   Anyway, this is a cover of a classic rap song, which immediately elevates it above standard MSI fare.  You can tell Jimmy had lot of fun with this one,  there’s so much energy in it it’s almost cartoony.  I’d kill to see this song animated.

2. Friday I’m In Love- The Cure

When The Cure makes  happy pop songs, they do it well.  It’s a song about Friday and being in love for god’s sake!  That makes everyone happy!  That aside,  this song never fails to make me feel mellow and complacent.   It’s not as catchy as Let’s Go To Bed or something like that, but I think that’s why I like it more.  It’s got just the right amount of happy and angst.  (Also, that video man.  I totally want to hang out with those guys.)

1. Twilight- Electric Light Orchestra

This isn’t exactly a happy song, but I always feel better after I listen to it.  I’m not going to lie, part of the reason is because of the Daicon IV animation, which had a profound effect on me, but just listen to it.  The synths and vocals just fucking elevate you.   Then pair it with the transience and sort of ethereal subject of the lyrics,  and you’ve got something that really hits home.  I wish I could listen to more music like this (still haven’t found the album this is from), but I honestly don’t know where to start.

My name is Dory, and I’m…

80 – 100 points: Your Internet usage is causing significant problems in your life. You should evaluate the impact of the Internet on your life and address the problems directly caused by your Internet usage.

(take the quiz yourself)

My score was an 83.  Awesome.  I’m supposed to be doing winter break homework right now.